1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
“I’m only 20 years old.” I thought to my self repeatedly as I sat on an international plane to a city I have never been to. I don’t know how to speak their language and I didn’t know what to expect when I stepped off this plane. It seems strange to me that I absolutely had to no idea what I was doing, but I had all the confidence in the world. I walked through the long tunnels of the Rio de Janeiro airport to customs. With my two carry on bags digging into my shoulder and holding onto my passport with an iron grip in fear of someone stealing it, I kept moving forward. Following our group as we step in line with a hundred other eager travelers. The smell of frozen dinners and morning breathe begins to fill the area and I remember the becoming so impatient, ready to step outside onto the streets of Brazil.
I was running on fours of sleep and a small muffin from the plane, but once I stepped on the bus to our hostel, the feelings of hunger, fatigue and nervous begin to flutter away. I sat in the window seat, I leaned my head against the window and I did not mutter a word. I was watching the cars, buildings and the landscape pass by. I wasn’t looking for anything, but I was looking at everything. Capturing pictures in my mind, remembering the smell of the musky tour bus and the feeling of the soft damp seats on the back of my knees. This was it, I was in Rio de Janeiro- I am at the Olympics. I once again thought, “I am only 20 years old.”
Once we stepped off the bus to our hotel, I stood in the streets, voices begin muffle and I started to walk away. A huge bush of pink flowers hung over a wall and the high noon light shined on them as if they were screaming, “take my picture.” That was photo number one. I turn around and took photos of the narrow streets and I looked up at our ancient hostel, guarded with a cement wall and the rustic orange roof. I finally take my bag and race around the hostel, looking for who knows what, but I found it on the roof. Standing on the roof top, ignoring all orders and instructions of finding our rooms and signing our names on pieces of paper with Portuguese that I could not read. Instead, I sat on the roof top. I let my legs hang on the side and I watched the people on bikes zip by and people walking their dogs. The sun felt warm, but the breeze felt cool on my smelly skin. Here I am, on a roof top in Rio de Janeiro. My only thought was, “I am only 20-years-old.”
Each day was a new adventure, we would go to Sugar Loaf mountains, the Olympic Boulevard, the Media center or to Christ the Redeemer. Each day we were taken to a new location and we had a certain amount of time to get interviews, stories and photos to create a package of information to push out to different media outlets. The best days were the one we had freedom. The days they told us to go, find a story. Find a event to take photos of and those were the most difficult days. I am a photographer and on the days I was told to go shoot, I found that people either loved getting their picture taken or hated it. I would ask for names and they couldn’t understand me or they would just tell me no. The hardest part was, I might have a great photo but I they did not give me their name- I had no picture, that was the rule. There were days I got ripped apart from my instructors about my the photos I turned in. Though all I wanted to do was curl up in a ball and cry to my dad on the phone, I told my self. “You are 20-years-old,” so act like it.
The next day, I picked up my camera after taking 8 deep breathe’s and I set a goal of what I wanted to get out of the day- I wanted some damn good portraits and some incredible culture shots. We went to Santa Teresa that day and it was the most crowded situation I have ever been in. People from all over the world were on colorful stairs in Escada da Delapa doing the same thing, getting a pictures of them selves sitting on the stairs. I thought how lame is that, but I also thought- this is my opportunity. I took over 5,000 photos that day and I only edited 75 of them. I had names for all the people I needed and I had the portraits I was looking for. It was the most successful shoot I had in the whole trip. So what was so different? Why was today such a successful shoot and the other days were not, what changed? I unleashed my childlike wonder. I am only 20-years-old I tell my self. That is such a young age to be traveling the world, especially as a photographer to the Olympics. I stopped being scared of people, I started laughing with them and I began to connect with them. I began to love their culture as much as they did. My fear of failing began to float away and started exploring as if there was no limits, like a child on a playground. I broke the rules, I turned my back to the group and I begin to have success behind the view finder. I am 20-years-old, but I followed directions like a 7-year-old. I didn’t care who got upset with me or what other were doing. We are at the Olympics, in Rio de Janeiro there is no time for rules or boundaries. Did I miss opportunities, absolutely. I don’t think there is a time that you don’t miss great photo opportunities, but did I live and feel? I lived to the fullest extent when I was exploring that city. I came, I saw and I loved so deeply that I left my heart on top of the mountains that roll around the city. I miss Rio, everyday. My life feels so boring and bland without waking up to that city and it made me truly fall in love with what I do. I feel as though we get to comfortable with talking to people here on American soil, we forget how to interact with other human-beings and when it becomes difficult we shut down, instead of changing our mind set to be open and humble. One the most important qualities I learned from this trip is humility. I can’t take photo’s when I feel cocky and full of my self, but I can take great ones when I set goals and find what I can do to become a better photographer. The sad thing is, I had to fly to another country to figure that out. Bill Bryson once said, “Suddenly you’re five years old again. You can’t read anything, you only have the rudimentary sense of how things works, you cant even reliably cross a street without endangering you life. Your whole existence become a series of interesting guesses.” And reading this, has made all the difference.
“I’m only 20 years old.” I thought to my self repeatedly as I sat on an international plane to a city I have never been to. I don’t know how to speak their language and I didn’t know what to expect when I stepped off this plane. It seems strange to me that I absolutely had to no idea what I was doing, but I had all the confidence in the world. I walked through the long tunnels of the Rio de Janeiro airport to customs. With my two carry on bags digging into my shoulder and holding onto my passport with an iron grip in fear of someone stealing it, I kept moving forward. Following our group as we step in line with a hundred other eager travelers. The smell of frozen dinners and morning breathe begins to fill the area and I remember the becoming so impatient, ready to step outside onto the streets of Brazil.